I am now at a point where I never thought I'd be. I am content with where my life has taken me and although the road has been long and sometimes difficult I wouldn't change a thing. I have been changed by all the people along the way and I am learning how to live my life. Sure maybe it isn't the plan that I had originally, but that is what makes it an adventure.
We have an advantage over people who have never been ill. We move slower to enable us to see more around us, enjoy it, learn from it and pass that knowledge on. Remember Aesop's tortoise and the hare? The hare moved so quickly that he decided he could take a nap. In the meantime the tortoise slowly and steadily won the race. What do you think the hare enjoyed in his hurried need to finish first? I always imagine this tortoise who Aesop says was ridiculed for his short feet and slow pace -- I imagine him enjoying the feel of the grass beneath his feet, the smells, the sounds and the view!
Cindy* your lighthouse post really made me happy. I imagined the hundreds of tourist and hikers who begrudingly climed the steps of that lighthouse just to finish. Just to do it. You on the other hand understood the value of each of those steps, and relished in a victory.
This disease changes us, during this illness we become so angry and upset that we begin to measure our worth on the amount of steps we take in the day... we are just like the hare. We want to finish first. Now I realize that it isn't the amount of steps I take in the day... it truly is the quality of those steps. I'm slower and weaker than most, but I do have the power to win the race. Slow and Steady. Somedays I may only get out of bed a couple times, but from my bed I am able to dream. On good days I may walk my kids into their classroom and be a huge part of their world. I can hold the hand of someone who is hurting. I can be a friend. I can bake a cake for my elderly neighbor. I can pray. I used to see those things as limitations... I can only.... I can only.... You see, just because people can doesn't mean they do. We are those people who CAN do.
We are the champions in this race.
*Cindy recently had a bilateral adrenalectomy after a failed surgery to remove all tumor tissue from her pituitary. She shared her recovery with us, including pictures of a hike made to a lighthouse while on vacation. It was very inspiring.
Gals, I just want you to know that you inspire me. Thank you so much for sharing.